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Writer's pictureShawn Paul

40 Ways: How to Love Your Neighbor as Yourself?

Updated: Nov 21

Today, we're diving into something at the heart of our faith - loving our neighbors.


It's easy to say we follow Jesus' teachings, but when it comes to this commandment, are we really walking the walk?


I recently had to look hard at myself and realized I had some work to do in this area. I was genuinely lacking, and I needed to correct my shortcomings.


Let's explore together what it truly means to love our neighbors as ourselves, who exactly our "neighbors" are (hint: it's probably more people than you think!),


Trust me, as we unpack this, you might find yourself seeing life - and the people in it - in a whole new light.


Ready to dive in? Let's go!


neighbors talking

Loving Your Neighbor as Yourself is a Commandment


Matthew 22:37–40 (NLT) — 37 Jesus replied, “ ‘You must love the LORD your God with all your heart, all your soul, and all your mind.’ 38 This is the first and greatest commandment. 39 A second is equally important: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ 40 The entire law and all the demands of the prophets are based on these two commandments.”

If we follow these two commands, we will fully align ourselves with the Word of God. You will begin to see other things fall into place. We will truly find ourselves living the way of Christ. As Jesus said, “On these two commandments hang all the Law and the Prophets.” We should see ourselves filtering our whole life through them.


Many say, oh, I follow these, but do we? I had to take an honest look at myself recently. I believed I was genuinely devoted to the things of God and my love for Him. However, I lacked the other command in many ways. If I am honest with myself, I was willing to violate if the proper circumstances arose. Then the question comes to mind, if I was willing to violate to love my neighbor, was I following the 1st? As we do the first, we will be compelled to do the 2nd.


Who is Your Neighbor?


We can all come up with an idea of who our neighbors are. The Bible speaks much about loving your brother and sister in Christ. If you have no love for them, the love of the Father is not in you. The word neighbor is extended beyond that.


Galatians 6:10 (NLT) — 10 Therefore, whenever we have the opportunity, we should do good to everyone—especially to those in the family of faith.
1 Thessalonians 3:12 (NLT) — 12 And may the Lord make your love for one another and for all people grow and overflow, just as our love for you overflows.

Neighbors are all those around us, anyone we may encounter, and even our enemies, believe it or not. No one is exempt from being our neighbor.


When we choose to have this attitude, it is a win-win for the Kingdom of God. As we show God’s love in any situation, we can show them who Jesus is. Therefore, when we do, we can draw people who are not believers in God’s precious salvation through His Son, Jesus, because they witnessed our genuine love for them, and they recognize that it’s not of our own but the Lord’s.


saved by Jesus

Love Your Neighbor As Yourself


Matthew 22:39 (NLT) — 39 A second is equally important: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’

For the most part, all people love themselves. I know some don’t, and they hate their very existence. But again, most people do love themselves.


What does it mean to love ourselves?


Matthew 7:12 (NKJV) — 12 Therefore, whatever you want men to do to you, do also to them, for this is the Law and the Prophets.

Take a moment and think about what you would want others to do to you. Here are some I thought of:


  • Love you

  • Show respect

  • Be kind

  • Consider your feelings

  • Do not do evil to you

  • Be truthful

  • Listen to you

  • Pray for you

  • Be generous


Plant 1 Corinthians 13:4-7 in Your Heart


1 Corinthians 13:4–7 (NLT) — 4 Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud 5 or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged. 6 It does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. 7 Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance.

I was in the US Army for four years. I can remember doing training exercises over and over. The reason was for us to get to the point of responding to situations without even thinking about it. This is called muscle memory.


Here is an excerpt from an article from the US Marine website: “Muscle Memory Helps Corpsmen Save Lives.”


“With anything, you have to rehearse consistently to have the muscle memory, that quick, initial reaction,” said Hernandez. “I think under stressful situations, it’s human nature to kind of get that narrow, [tunnel vision]. Even with that, your muscle memory and consistent training automatically kick in, and you start doing things amazingly without even thinking about it because you’ve been training. [These drills] allow these guys to kind of see where their skills are lacking or where they could have done something different.”


This goes the same with training or meditating on God’s Word. We want to get to the point where we don’t respond with our old nature or the flesh. We want to respond according to God’s written Word.


As you can see from these love scriptures, it would do us well if we memorized this and continually kept it before us. We could avoid many situations by walking in love.


food drive

Start by Being Intentional


Since this is a command of Jesus, I think we must put this on the for front in our lives. It’s not something we can passively think about. Only do it when it feels good.


Being intentional means done on purpose or deliberately. Even though it may not be convenient at the time, you still do it.


I think this starts in our prayer time with God. Asking him to help you see your neighbor for who they are in His eyes. We need to see them as Jesus does. When we do this, we can approach them from an angle of compassion and love as from Christ Himself.


The Holy Spirit dwells in all our hearts as believers in Christ. He is there to bring things to our remembrance. If we pray with sincerity. I promise you, that He will keep your prayer before you as you go about your day. Don’t ignore Him when He prompts you to do it, either. It may be as simple as smiling at someone or going to your next-door neighbor’s house with a plate full of cookies.


Years ago, I struggled to deal with customer service reps on the phone. Many times, I couldn’t hear them, and sometimes, their strong accent made it difficult to understand. I am ashamed to admit, but I got nasty with them. Then one day, the Lord dealt with me about it. He told me I needed to correct my attitude. I made some serious changes, and believe it or not, when I am on the phone with a customer service person today, I go out of my way to be pleasant. Just that small change has affected my outlook.


Don’t Wait Until Someone Loves You First


A lot of times, we humans want someone to extend the olive branch to us first. They want someone to be kind first, and maybe, they will crack. Don’t be that person, be the one going out of your way to show love.


Years ago, I was working with a couple to help them refinance their home. As we sat down at their kitchen table, the wife had a sour look on her face. She had an I don’t want to be here attitude. I don’t think she knew of the meeting, and her husband sprung it on her. I tried even saying something to crack a smile. She was not budging.


Then I said something like, you know, you have this tough exterior, but I think you have a huge soft heart. That busted the dam wide open. From then on, we were best of buddies throughout the refinancing process.


This goes for us as well. Don’t wait for someone to go out of their way to love you. Be the first to initiate it. I guarantee you will start seeing life in a different way. You will find it a blessing not only to them but also to yourself because you are the one breaking the ice.


lady pushing mom in a wheelchair

40 Ways to Show Love to Your Neighbor


These are only some ideas. Obviously, there are a million more as well. But maybe it might spark something inside of you.


Biblical Christian List


1. Forgive those who wrong you (Matthew 6:14-15)

2. Pray for others, including your enemies (Matthew 5:44)

3. Serve those in need (Matthew 25:35-40)

4. Show compassion to the suffering (Luke 10:30-37, the Good Samaritan parable)

5. Be patient and kind (1 Corinthians 13:4)

6. Speak truth in love (Ephesians 4:15)

7. Bear one another's burdens (Galatians 6:2)

8. Encourage and build up others (1 Thessalonians 5:11)

9. Practice hospitality (Romans 12:13)

10. Give generously to those in need (2 Corinthians 9:7)

11. Show mercy (Luke 6:36)

12. Treat others as you want to be treated (Luke 6:31)

13. Honor and respect others (Romans 12:10)

14. Be slow to anger and quick to listen (James 1:19)

15. Share the gospel message (Mark 16:15)

16. Visit the sick and imprisoned (Matthew 25:36)

17. Comfort those who mourn (Romans 12:15)

18. Practice humility and consider others better than yourself (Philippians 2:3)

19. Be a peacemaker (Matthew 5:9)

20. Show love without discrimination (James 2:1-9)


Everyday things we can do.


1. Listen actively when they speak

2. Offer help with tasks or chores

3. Give sincere compliments

4. Spend quality time together

5. Write thoughtful notes or messages

6. Cook their favorite meal

7. Remember important dates and events

8. Give hugs (when appropriate and welcomed)

9. Practice patience and understanding

10. Offer words of encouragement

11. Share in their joys and sorrows

12. Surprise them with small gifts

13. Be reliable and keep your promises

14. Express gratitude for their presence in your life

15. Respect their boundaries and opinions

16. Forgive mistakes and let go of grudges

17. Celebrate their achievements, big and small

18. Offer a helping hand during difficult times

19. Show interest in their passions and hobbies

20. Be present and put away distractions when with them


friends holding hands

Bringing it All Together


Loving our neighbors isn't just a nice idea - it's a command from Jesus that can truly change lives.


Remember, don't wait for others to make the first move. Be intentional, be kind, and let God's love shine through you. As you memorize 1 Corinthians 13:4-7, you will be doing it automatically as the Holy Spirit leads you.


Pick one way from my list to show love this week and see what happens. Who knows? You might just be the answer to someone's prayer.


So, let's get out there and love our neighbors like Jesus loves us. After all, that's what being a Christ-follower is all about, right?


Now, go make a difference!


Devotional Questions


1. When was the last time you went out of your way to show love to someone who wasn't expecting it? How did it make you feel, and how do you think it impacted them?


2. Think about a person in your life who's difficult to love. How might seeing them through God's eyes change your attitude and actions towards them?


3. Jesus said loving God and loving our neighbors are the two greatest commandments. How well are you balancing these in your daily life? Is there an area where you need to grow?


Scriptures About Loving Your Neighbor


Matthew 22:39 (NLT) — 39 A second is equally important: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’


Mark 12:31 (NLT) — 31 The second is equally important: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ No other commandment is greater than these.”


Luke 10:27 (NLT) — 27 The man answered, “ ‘You must love the LORD your God with all your heart, all your soul, all your strength, and all your mind.’ And, ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ ”


Leviticus 19:18 (NLT) — 18 “Do not seek revenge or bear a grudge against a fellow Israelite, but love your neighbor as yourself. I am the LORD.


Romans 13:9–10 (NLT) — 9 For the commandments say, “You must not commit adultery. You must not murder. You must not steal. You must not covet.” These—and other such commandments—are summed up in this one commandment: “Love your neighbor as yourself.” 10 Love does no wrong to others, so love fulfills the requirements of God’s law.


Galatians 5:14 (NLT) — 14 For the whole law can be summed up in this one command: “Love your neighbor as yourself.”


James 2:8 (NLT) — 8 Yes indeed, it is good when you obey the royal law as found in the Scriptures: “Love your neighbor as yourself.”


1 John 4:21 (NLT) — 21 And he has given us this command: Those who love God must also love their fellow believers.


John 13:34–35 (NLT) — 34 So now I am giving you a new commandment: Love each other. Just as I have loved you, you should love each other. 35 Your love for one another will prove to the world that you are my disciples.”


1 Peter 4:8 (NLT) — 8 Most important of all, continue to show deep love for each other, for love covers a multitude of sins.


1 Corinthians 13:4–7 (NLT) — 4 Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud 5 or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged. 6 It does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. 7 Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance.


Romans 12:9–10 (NLT) — 9 Don’t just pretend to love others. Really love them. Hate what is wrong. Hold tightly to what is good. 10 Love each other with genuine affection, and take delight in honoring each other.


Philippians 2:3–4 (NLT) — 3 Don’t be selfish; don’t try to impress others. Be humble, thinking of others as better than yourselves. 4 Don’t look out only for your own interests, but take an interest in others, too.


1 John 3:18 (NLT) — 18 Dear children, let’s not merely say that we love each other; let us show the truth by our actions.


Frequently Asked Questions


How to love difficult people?


Loving difficult people can be a challenge, but remember, as 1 Peter 4:8 says, "Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins." When we show love to those who are hard to love, we reflect the unconditional love that God has shown us. It's not always easy, but it's a powerful way to show the transformative power of God's love in our lives.


In Matthew 5:44, Jesus says, "But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you." This is a radical concept that goes against our human nature, but it's a powerful testimony to the love of Christ within us. By choosing to love difficult people, we demonstrate the love and grace that has been freely given to us by God.


Let's strive to emulate the love of Christ in all areas of our lives, especially when it comes to loving those who are challenging. As Romans 12:18 encourages us, "If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone." Let's rely on the grace and strength of God to love difficult people with the same love that has been poured out on us.


How to love those around you without compromising your faith?


In 1 Corinthians 13:4-7, it talks about love being patient, kind, not envious, not boastful, not proud, not dishonoring others, not self-seeking, not easily angered, keeps no record of wrongs, does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth, always protects, always trusts, always hopes, and always perseveres. These are great guidelines to follow as we navigate our relationships with others.


When we interact with people who have different beliefs or lifestyles than us, we can still show them love and respect without compromising our faith. Matthew 5:16, says, "In the same way, let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven." By living out our faith in a loving and compassionate way, we can be a positive influence on those around us and point them toward God's love.


Let's remember that loving others does not mean we have to agree with everything they say or do. As Romans 12:18 reminds us, "If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone." We can still show love and kindness while holding true to our beliefs and values. Let's strive to be beacons of light and love in a world that desperately needs it.


What does love thy neighbor mean for kids?


It's all about treating others with kindness, empathy, and compassion. Just like how God commands us to love our neighbors as ourselves in Mark 12:31, we should show love and respect to everyone we meet, no matter their background or beliefs.


Teaching kids to love their neighbor is more than just being nice - it's about showing the same love that Jesus showed to us. In 1 John 4:11, it says, "Beloved, if God so loved us, we also ought to love one another." By teaching our children to love their neighbors, we are instilling in them the importance of spreading God's love and kindness in the world.


So, the next time your child is playing with a friend or interacting with someone new, remind them what Jesus said in the Word of God. By practicing love and kindness towards their neighbors, they are living out the biblical principle of loving others as God loves us.


One final note, don’t teach your child to love their neighbor, and you show the exact opposite. They need to see it in your life as well.

 
Shawn Paul

Shawn Paul is an author and missionary who has been living and working in Central America for the past 10 years. He is passionate about living for Jesus Christ and inspiring others to do the same, which is the focus of his blog, where he shares his expertise in Christianity.


In addition to his missionary work, Shawn enjoys reading books, studying God's Word, growing plants and flowers, feeding birds, and keeping up with the latest technology.


As a writer, Shawn's unique perspective and passion for his faith shine through in his work. Shawn's goal for the future is to impact people around the world for Jesus through his writing and missionary work.

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