10 Characteristics of a Godly Husband

Want a marriage that remains strong even when life gets tough? After being married for 38 years, I can confidently say that following God's plan truly works. It can transform your marriage into something extraordinary.

In this post, I aim to show you how to be a good husband who embraces God's way. I'll share insights from the Bible along with what I've learned throughout the years. You'll discover how to love like Jesus, be there for your wife, protect her, and forge a close bond.

This article is intended for everyone, whether you just got married, wish to enhance your marriage, or are preparing to be a husband someday. I will demonstrate how to be the kind of husband your wife will love and respect, someone who genuinely cares for her, assists her, and follows God.

I pray that this blog will transform you and strengthen you in numerous ways.

Who Am I as a Husband

Being a Christian husband is one of the most rewarding experiences in my life. Currently, I have been married for over 38 years. Nancy and I have had our ups and downs. In our first four years, we didn’t know God, but once He came into our lives, it has been an upward trend ever since. Sure, we hit a few speed bumps along the way, but what marriage doesn’t?

As I reflect on my role as a husband, five things have helped me along the way.

• Continual Betterment: I have always sought to improve upon myself as her husband. My wife deserves that so much. We should all strive to be better husbands this year than we were in the past.

• Examine Myself: People often say to their spouses, 'If you would fix this, then our marriage would be better.” I look at myself, not her, on how to improve our marriage. I trust that the Holy Spirit will guide her in areas where she needs to grow.

• Being a Servant: I love serving my wife. Not only does it make her feel special, but Jesus is our prime example of serving others.

• Put Her First: I don’t care if it’s watching TV, going out to eat, or how we spend our Saturday. I will put her first. I want her desires to be fulfilled. This tells her that I value her, and she is special to me.

• I Want Her Opinion: It’s not that I need her opinion. I WANT her opinion. I genuinely value who she is as a person and what God has placed in her heart. She is full of wisdom and ideas. I believe we are one, and it is of utmost importance to listen to her.

What is a Godly Husband

Sadly, the world is missing out on godly husbands. I don’t think there are enough. I believe the world is in the place that it is because of the lack of.

While serving in the mission field for eleven years. It was not uncommon to see churches full of women and only a few men. It is not macho to go to church in the Latin countries we served in.

A godly husband is a man who models his marriage after Christ's relationship with the church, putting God first and his wife second in all aspects of life. He strives to love, cherish, and nurture his wife just as Christ loves the church, viewing his role as both a privilege and a sacred responsibility.

This divine calling transforms an ordinary marriage into an extraordinary testimony of God's love. When a husband embraces this biblical blueprint, he creates a home environment where both he and his wife can flourish in their God-given purposes, growing together in faith and love.

Characteristics of a Godly Husband

Godly women desire godly husbands who possess strong biblical characteristics. They want them to take them by the hand and lead them the way to go by the Word of God.

Men, you are not to treat your wives like a doormat. The Bible speaks of our wives as a “Help Meet” in Genesis 2:18 KJV. They are to be by our sides, not behind or beneath us. They are our partners in every way, sharing life's journey intellectually, morally, and physically. A wife's role is neither lesser nor greater; she brings essential strengths and abilities that complement what her husband may be lacking.

Once you understand this and treat your wife properly, you will see a remarkable transformation in your marriage. This is why knowing the character of a godly husband and implementing it in your life is so essential.

1. Spiritual Leader

In 1990, I made a significant decision that would alter our lives forever as a family. It continues to have a profound impact on us as a whole, as well as on our son-in-law’s and grandchildren's lives.

During my lunch hour while in the military, I called my landlord, who was a pastor. He didn’t know me personally. I told him that I want to meet him to commit my life to Jesus Christ. A moment later, I found myself in his office, bowing my head and reciting the sinner's prayer, inviting Jesus into my heart.

When I got back home, I did something that radically transformed everything for Nancy and me. I told her that I had just given my life to Jesus; she needed to give her life to Him as well, and we are going to church this Sunday.

Some may argue that it is not leadership, but rather authoritarianism. That is not your decision to make for your wife. She needs to do that herself. As you read on, you will see my heart and who I am as a husband. But if you read Joshua 24:15, you will understand that there was no choice in his family either.

Because I led my family unto Christ, we have known nothing else ever since. It has saved our family a great deal of pain. For the last 25 years, we have lived relatively peaceful lives. I am not trying to paint a rosy picture here. I can tell you this: we have made mistakes along the way, but God is within our family.

Men, you must lead your family:

• Lead by Example in Faith (1 Timothy 4:12)

• Take your family to church (Hebrews 10:25)

• Guide Family in Worship (Joshua 24:15)

• Teach God's Word (Deuteronomy 6:6-7)

• Practice Servant Leadership (Mark 10:43-44)

• Maintain Spiritual Accountability (James 5:16)

• Protect Family's Spiritual Well-being (Ephesians 6:4)

2. Day-to-Day Leadership

Not only should the husband be a spiritual leader, but he should also take an active role in leading the home, all the while the husband and wife respect each other’s strengths. Remember, men, your wife is a helpmate.

Sadly, I have heard and seen too many women express that they are exhausted and pushed to the limit because their husbands will not step up. They take a pass on leading their homes. I know there may be some blowback from some who will read this, but women want strong men to lead. Again, and I stress, wives are NEVER to be treated like a doormat. They are to be honored, respected, and loved.

Yes, I lead our home, but I value everything my wife says and thinks. I consider what she thinks is important. I truly make sure she understands that we are making decisions together. Even when things may seem to be going sideways in a conversation, she wants to avoid the discussion by just saying, “Just make the decision.” No, I slow things down and assure her I want US to make the decision together.

Leading by example is very critical within the home. The man can’t do one thing and expect his wife to do the same. Example: it’s not okay for him to go out with the boys fishing, and then his wife never has an opportunity to be with her friends shopping. Or how about he can buy all the toys, and his wife has to walk around in rags for clothes?

Here are some areas a husband should be leading in:

• Financial management

• Decision-Making in Major Family Matters

• Household Maintenance and Oversight

• Emotional Leadership and Support

• Parenting and Discipline

• Modeling Values and Work Ethic

• Long-term planning

• Emergency preparedness

• Technology and security

• Career and professional growth

3. Lover and Devoted

This is one of my favorite parts of being a husband. I am a sucker for loves stories. I am a lover, not a fighter, by nature. I have always yearned for love and peace in my home, even as a child; I have always sought a loving relationship with my parents. Being in love is one of life's greatest joys for me. To me, my wife is the perfect woman to be in love with.

A godly husband is a lover through God’s love. Our love for our wives should be unconditional, just like God’s love towards us. We express our deep affection, commitment, and care through both emotional and physical intimacy, always within the boundaries God has designed. The best way is to look towards our ultimate example, Jesus. We are to love our wives, like Christ loves the church.

True love transcends physical attraction and emotional feelings. If it didn’t, you would be on a roller coaster in your marriage. It is a daily choice you make to be a lover by cherishing, honoring, and serving your wife. We have to be intentional about being lovers. There will be times when you don’t feel like it, but you must.

That leads to devotion. You must have a deep, unwavering commitment and dedication to your spouse. It involves being faithfully attached, loyal, and committed through all circumstances. A devoted husband consistently demonstrates his love and commitment through actions, not just words. You can see this devotion when a husband prioritizes his marriage relationship; he is emotionally present and maintains fidelity in thought and deed.

Your wife should never have to question whether you will be reliable and steadfast. We men should be solid rocks for them, knowing that we will be there in the good or bad times.

Sadly, I have seen a fair share of marriages where men fail their wives in this area. We godly men can’t be this way. We have to give our wives the best we can.

4. Relation Builder

Are you tearing down or building up? I have a policy with anyone in my life (family member, friend, neighbor, co-worker, acquaintance). I never seek to burn a bridge with people. I always try to be a relationship builder. This is especially true with my wife.

Years ago, a book titled “The 5 Love Languages: The Secret to Love That Lasts” by Gary Chapman was released. I was eager to dive into it because I felt I would finally understand my wife. I was determined to discover her love language and enhance our marriage. If you haven’t read it, I highly recommend that you do.

During that time, our church hosted a Wednesday night marriage class, and we were going through a book. After we finished and discussed the love languages, we took turns sharing our own. When it was my wife's turn, I was on pins and needles. Finally, after about 20 years of marriage, I was going to receive the holy grail. I was about to learn how to love my wife even more. My wife began to share her love language. She said that she couldn’t just identify with one, which is fine because many people choose two. She stated that she identified with ALL FIVE! WHAT???

Today, I look back at that and laugh. That is my wonderful bride of 38 years. That is why I am still madly in love with her today! Life is NEVER dull with her. It’s an honor and joy that I still get to work all of her love languages to this day.

Men should strive to be better husbands to their wives every day. What is the beautiful part? Your wife will want to do the same for you. It will be an ongoing cycle of two people working harder and harder to become better spouses.

Here are the five love languages in the book:

• Words of Affirmation: Uses words to affirm other people.

• Acts of Service: When actions speak louder than words.

• Receiving Gifts: To this person, nothing makes them feel as special as receiving a well-thought-out gift.

• Quality Time: Time well spent is the most important.

• Physical Touch: For some, nothing speaks more deeply than appropriate touch.

Relationship building is built upon different components, and as a whole, it will excel your relationship with your wife. It’s essential to assess how you are using these tools.

Consider a car. You can have everything working correctly, but if just one cylinder isn’t firing, it can cause the vehicle to run poorly and lose power. It’s the same with building a relationship with your wife. I wish it were quick and easy to do just one thing effectively, but it doesn’t work that way. Here are some key considerations for building a strong relationship with your wife.

• Regular Communication

    - Daily check-ins

    - Share thoughts and feelings openly

    - Practice active listening

• Quality Time Together

    - Date nights

    - Shared hobbies and interests

    - Undistracted one-on-one time

• Emotional Connection

    - Show empathy and understanding

    - Validate her feelings

    - Be emotionally available

• Physical Affection

    - Non-sexual touches throughout the day

    - Hugs and kisses

    - Hold hands

• Mutual Support

    - Encourage her dreams and goals

    - Be there during difficult times

    - Celebrate her achievements

• Shared Responsibilities

    - Equal partnership in household duties

    - Joint decision-making

    - Mutual respect for each other's roles

• Personal Growth Together

    - Learn and grow as a couple

    - Support each other's personal development

    - Set and achieve goals together

5. Servant

In the past, I was a knucklehead in my marriage for many years. Yes, there are many things I did right, but also many things I did not. As time has passed, driven by my desire to be a better husband, I have refined my character.

Serving is one of the areas I didn’t fully grasp until about seven years ago when we lived in Honduras. My daughter was pregnant and living with her husband in Guatemala City, so my wife went to their home for a month to help out. During that month, I had to cook, clean, do laundry, shop, and so on. I couldn’t believe the amount of work involved, and was exhausted by the end of the day.

When my wife got back, I turned over a new leaf and started helping her around the house. And you know what? I began to enjoy it. I saw how we were connecting on a deeper level. It was a joy to be in the kitchen with my wife, and I even took it upon myself to be the official dishwasher.

As we can see from scripture, Jesus is our example. He came to serve. We should have the same heart, especially for our wives, prioritizing their needs over our own.

Here are some areas that we can serve our wives:

• Help with household chores

    - Share in cooking and meal preparation

    - Assist with laundry and cleaning

    - Take initiative in home maintenance

• Take initiative in daily responsibilities

    - Help with childcare and school activities

    - Run errands without being asked

    - Schedule appointments and manage calendar items

• Create moments of rest

    - Give her time for self-care

    - Take over responsibilities so she can relax

    - Plan activities that help her recharge

• Show thoughtfulness

    - Remember essential dates and celebrations

    - Notice when she needs help without being asked

    - Express gratitude for her contributions

Remember that serving should be done with a willing and joyful heart, not out of obligation. This attitude reflects Christ's example of servant leadership.

One final note: every home dynamic is different. For years, my wife was a stay-at-home mother. Along with our two daughters, she performed the house duties. Today, our kids are grown, and we both work outside of the home, and we both take care of household duties. It’s essential to assess your household situation.

6. Humble

You want to know how to destroy your marriage. Be full of pride. It builds a wall between you and your wife. It doesn't foster genuine intimacy and growth. In many cases, it causes your wife to resent you.

A truly humble husband will think less of himself and more of his wife. This means you are prioritizing your wife’s well-being and the health of your relationship over your ego.

I want to emphasize that there is a balance. Philippians says that you “don’t look out ONLY for your own interests. BUT take an interest in others, too.” This statement is not one or the other. It’s a balance. I don’t want to give the impression that a husband is to be a whipping post in the marriage. It’s a give-and-take of mutual respect for one another. 

I have no problem saying that I am sorry to my wife. I have no problem expressing that my wife hurt my feelings or celebrating a win in my wife’s life. I am not less than a man when I do. Dropping your pride is a massive game-changer in your marriage. It will open the door wide for a successful relationship.

I know of one marriage where the wife can’t even pick out a decoration for the living room without the husband expressing his distaste and saying she can’t decorate. Or another demanding that his wife serve him at the breakfast table because that's her job. I know we all need to work on things, and I have had my fair share of issues to address, which persist to this day. BUT I think we all should have an inner desire to grow and flee from these types of toxic behaviors.

Here are several ways a husband demonstrates humility in marriage:

• Admits mistakes readily and sincerely apologizes without making excuses

• Values and seriously consider his wife's perspective, even when it differs from his own

• Willingly accepts constructive criticism from his wife about his behavior or actions

• Celebrates his wife's achievements without feeling threatened or competitive

• Makes decisions together with his wife rather than unilaterally

• Acknowledges his weaknesses and areas where he needs to grow

• Shows gratitude for his wife's contributions to the family and marriage

• Puts his wife's needs before his own pride or preferences

7. Provider

Men, you are the provider for your household before your wife! PERIOD! That burden should never be placed upon your wife. Are there households where two incomes are needed? YES. Are there households where the wife makes more money than the man? YES. Are there situations where the couple chooses for the man to stay home with the kids and the wife works outside the home? YES. However, that is their choice together in prayer, and she is not pressured into doing so. Sometimes, it makes economic sense to do so. Additionally, there may be situations where the man is unable to work due to unique circumstances, such as unforeseen physical or mental health issues.

In our home, my wife worked outside the house, and when we had our second child, my wife stayed home with the kids until they got into upper junior high and high school. Today, our kids are adults, and they have children of their own. My wife works outside the home. I told her, “You don’t have to work; this is your choice.” She chose to do so. The key is that she has never been pressured to do so.

I want to ensure that I don’t paint a picture where the husband is slaving away while the wife sits at home watching soap operas on TV. It should always be balanced. If you read Proverbs 31:10-31, the virtuous woman,” the wife is very industrious within the home and outside. Not only is she taking care of her home and family, but she is also constantly buying and selling, working hard to support her family in various ways.

Again, it is a balance, but I do stress that the provision of the home rests on the shoulders of the husband, unless there is a unique situation.

8. Protector

When I think of protecting my wife, I immediately think of physical harm, but there is more to it than just that. There is also emotional and spiritual protection. Your responsibility is to ensure that no harm comes to your spouse and family in any shape or form. This is in your home and the world we live in. 

I realize we can’t put our wives in a cocoon and shelter them from the world. However, we must remain vigilant at all times.

 I am a former military member. I am always thinking of security. It’s not that I obsess over it, but I am conscious of it around my home. We have cameras all around our house and weapons. Even when we go to a restaurant, I sit in a seat where I can observe what's going on. When we walk down the street, I am always looking out for my wife’s safety, not only from vehicles, but also from those who are approaching my wife.

Again, it doesn’t end with physical harm. Then you have emotions. 100% I am not going to permit anyone to talk down to my wife and belittle her. That goes the same for me. I don’t care if I am in her presence or with my buddies. I will never degrade her.

It is sad when you hear spouses cut one another down. There is no place for it. I recall years ago, when I was a kid, my parents discussing how one couple made them feel uncomfortable because the wife would belittle her husband all the time.

Years ago, before Christ, I used to make my wife the butt of the joke to our friends. It wasn't very pleasant the way I treated her. Then, years later, after becoming a Christian and no longer treating my wife that way, we were at a friend’s house who we went to church with. All night, he belittled his wife. It was extremely uncomfortable. On the way home, the car was really quiet. Then I asked my wife if I treated her that way. She said, "Exactly." It was eye-opening to see myself in my friend.

Finally, spiritual protection is to safeguard your home from any demonic influence. It can come from the TV, the internet, or music. Today, our kids are adults, but you can ask them if I was strict in these areas. They would tell you yes, but are thankful I was. I didn’t permit rated R content, cursing, or sex on our televisions. To this day, I am the same. Also, I didn’t allow secular music. We had filters on the computers. To some, this may be extreme, but you know what, we didn’t have the problems with our kids that many parents dealt with. Today, my daughters and grandkids serve the Lord.

The same applies here as well; spiritual protection is just as important outside the home as it is within the home. We don’t go to movies, bars, or other places that would be deemed spiritually harmful.

The Bible speaks of being aware of the devil's wiles or schemes. He wants to bring destruction upon your family. He will do it whatever way he can. You have to protect them.

9. Sexually Pure

A godly marriage requires a pure sex life. The husband should strive for purity in both mind and actions. Nothing should be brought to the marriage bed that is impure. This even means coercing his wife to perform acts that she is not comfortable with. She is to be honored and respected in all areas of sex. Also, sex is to stay private between each other; there is no shop talk with the boys about your sex life with your spouse.

I believe satan battles men in the area of sex in different ways. This is a battle not to be taken alone. The Lord must help you to give you the strength to be pure. I know this should be a given, but some men feel so ashamed that they try to battle it alone. Even accountability partners, such as a brother in your church or a fellow Bible study participant, can also be there for you.

Over the years, I have had my wife as my accountability partner. I have even gone as far as to have an app loaded on my computer and cell phone. It monitors my online activity. Some would say that this is a bit extreme. Not to me, I have nothing to hide from my wife. She has access to EVERYTHING! I can leave my cellphone on the table in the living room to go to the restroom. She can look at anything. I have no concerns.

Living this way is so refreshing for me. I don’t want to hide anything from her. I want to have purity in my life. There is nothing like having a pure marriage bed. God designed it that way, and it’s the ultimate way to go.

I genuinely believe many men struggle with sexual performance issues in bed with their spouses because of pornography and masturbation. It destroys what God intended and perverts not only the mind but the body as well. Some men have to take medication to have intercourse with their wives because of it. I am not saying it’s for all cases. I understand that there may also be underlying health issues.

Years ago, I listened to a marriage counselor, Mark Unger. He said that men who look at pornography rewires their brains and that the act of masturbating to it trains their bodies to have sex differently, to the point where they can’t even have sex in a normal way that God intended.

If you are reading this and struggle with issues in this area, I highly recommend reading my article, "12 Keys For Victory Over Temptation."

Then there is the sexual thought of having sex with other women, or even physically doing so, which is a whole different issue. It’s simply wrong and unacceptable. This type of behavior is not only destructive to your relationship with God, but to your marriage.

10. Godly Father for Your Children

There is a special bond a mother has with her children that not even the father can have. The old saying 'not to get between a mama bear and her cubs' is so true when it comes to mothers and their children.

My wife is so protective of our two daughters that I have to use caution when discussing something about them in a negative light. Don’t get me wrong, I am not scared to do so, but I approach it differently.

I want to be very careful when I say this, so I'll preface it with a disclaimer. I realize bad kids can come from wonderful, godly homes. However, years ago, my pastor in Iowa shared something with me that I will never forget.

I was a leader in the church. We were discussing a situation involving a young man and his unruly behavior. He was getting into trouble quite frequently. I mentioned that his parents in our church were such strong Christians. My pastor said, “Shawn, what you see is not always the case in the home.”

Sadly, many men put on a persona that they are good Christians in public, but behind closed doors, they are the exact opposite. Their children see something different. It causes so much confusion in their minds and spirits. It can bring so much destruction to their lives.

I say all this because many times, the mothers of these children are not responsible for this type of behavior. They are the godly examples the kids need and want nothing but a godly husband inside the home, just as much as he tries to portray it outside the house.

Men, we have to be consistent in our homes. We must live for Jesus inside the house just as much as we do outside, or at least at church on Sundays. Our children need to see us praying, reading the Bible, and living according to its teachings everywhere.

When a mother has a truly godly man before her children, it brings such strength and joy to her heart. It blesses her to no end.

Bringing It All Together

Being a godly husband is not a destination but a journey, one that requires daily commitment, continuous growth, and unwavering faith. As we've explored these ten essential principles, remember that perfection isn't the goal; progress is. Every step taken in alignment with God's design for marriage brings you closer to being the husband He has called you to be.

Through my nearly four decades of marriage, I've learned that these biblical principles aren't mere suggestions; they're foundational truths that can transform your marriage from ordinary to extraordinary. When you commit to leading with love, maintaining humility, providing and protecting, staying pure, and being a godly father, you create an environment where your marriage can flourish as God intended.

Remember, your role as a husband is a sacred calling. It's an opportunity to reflect Christ's love for the church in how you love and serve your wife. The journey may not always be easy, but with God's guidance and these biblical principles as your compass, you can build a marriage that not only honors Him but also becomes a testament to His grace and wisdom.

May God bless you as you pursue His plan for your marriage, and may your commitment to being a godly husband inspire others to do the same.

Devotional Questions

1. Spiritual Leadership (Joshua 24:15): Reflect on my decision to lead my family to Christ and its lasting impact. How can you take practical steps to lead your family spiritually, such as guiding family worship or modeling faith through your actions? What challenges might you face, and how can you rely on God’s strength to overcome them?

2. Servant Leadership (Mark 10:45, Galatians 5:13b): I describe how serving my wife, such as helping with household chores, deepened our connection. In what specific ways can you serve your spouse with a joyful heart this week? How does Jesus’ example of servanthood inspire you to prioritize your spouse’s needs?

3. Humility in Marriage (Philippians 2:3-4): The article emphasizes that pride can destroy a marriage, while humility fosters intimacy and depth in relationships. Think of a recent situation where pride may have hindered your relationship with your spouse. How can you practice humility by admitting mistakes or valuing your spouse’s perspective in future interactions?

4. Building Relationships (1 Peter 3:7): I share how understanding my wife’s love languages strengthened our bond. Which of the five love languages (words of affirmation, acts of service, receiving gifts, quality time, physical touch) resonates most with your spouse? Plan one specific action this week to express love in their preferred love language.

5. Protecting Your Marriage (1 Thessalonians 4:3-5, Hebrews 13:4): The article highlights the importance of sexual purity and protecting your spouse emotionally and spiritually. What practical steps can you take to safeguard your marriage from external influences, such as inappropriate media or harmful conversations? How can you and your spouse support each other in maintaining purity and trust?

Scriptures for Marriage

Genesis 2:24 (NLT) — 24 This explains why a man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one.

Ephesians 5:22–25 (NLT) — 22 For wives, this means submit to your husbands as to the Lord. 23 For a husband is the head of his wife as Christ is the head of the church. He is the Savior of his body, the church. 24 As the church submits to Christ, so you wives should submit to your husbands in everything. 25 For husbands, this means love your wives, just as Christ loved the church. He gave up his life for her.

1 Corinthians 7:3–4 (NLT) — 3 The husband should fulfill his wife’s sexual needs, and the wife should fulfill her husband’s needs. 4 The wife gives authority over her body to her husband, and the husband gives authority over his body to his wife.

Hebrews 13:4 (NLT) — 4 Give honor to marriage, and remain faithful to one another in marriage. God will surely judge people who are immoral and those who commit adultery.

Proverbs 18:22 (NLT) — 22 The man who finds a wife finds a treasure, and he receives favor from the Lord.

1 Corinthians 13:4-7 (NLT) — 4 Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud 5 or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged. 6 It does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. 7 Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance.

1 Peter 4:8 (NLT) — 8 Most important of all, continue to show deep love for each other, for love covers a multitude of sins.

Colossians 3:14 (NLT) — 14 Above all, clothe yourselves with love, which binds us all together in perfect harmony.

Frequently Asked Questions

1. What does submission look like in a biblical marriage?

Submission in marriage isn’t about weakness or losing one's voice; instead, it reflects a mutual respect and love that echoes the respect and love Christ has for the church, as mentioned in Ephesians 5:22-33. In a God-centered relationship, both partners uplift and support one another, recognizing each other's unique strengths and callings as gifts from God. It's about building each other up, not tearing each other down.

Interestingly, submission blends beautifully with teamwork. When two people understand each other's strengths and accept their respective roles, success naturally follows. Think of it like a dance—each one has steps to follow, yet together, they create a beautiful harmony. The Holy Spirit empowers both partners to lead with love and serve with joy, just like Christ served His disciples.

Moreover, it’s also about active listening and learning. Just as Proverbs 31 highlights a strong and respected woman, submission in marriage means valuing each other's wisdom and growing together in faith and understanding. It's a partnership drenched in love, guided by kindness, and steered by shared values. A marriage centered on God thrives on trust and open communication, encouraged by the guidance of the Holy Spirit.

I want to leave you with this. I believe that when two people who love God and chase after him together, there will be minimal disagreements. They will naturally flow together with the Holy Spirit. When those times do arise, I believe God has given the husband the final authority within the home to make a final decision, and the wife is to submit to him. Ultimately, she will be blessed in doing so, and he will be held accountable for that decision.

2. What does it mean to leave and cleave biblically?

In Genesis 2:24, God says, "Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh." It's a foundational truth that Jesus even references in Matthew 19:5. The idea is that when we get married, we're creating a brand-new family unit; our spouse becomes our number one earthly priority and relationship.

The "leaving" part doesn't mean cutting off your parents or being disrespectful. It means shifting your primary loyalty and dependence from your family of origin to your spouse. You're establishing healthy boundaries and making decisions together as a team. The "cleaving" part is all about that deep, committed bond, one that sticks together through thick and thin, being united in purpose and direction.

It shows God's heart for marriage from the very beginning! He designed it to be this incredible partnership where two people become "one flesh," not losing their individual identities, but joining together in the most intimate way possible. Whether you're married, engaged, or hoping to be someday, this principle is such a game-changer for building strong, God-honoring relationships!

3. What is biblical pre-marriage counseling?

From my experience, most churches offer some form of pre-marriage counseling, typically provided by the pastor or a trained individual within the church. They can walk you through the steps needed to make that lifelong commitment of marriage.

Think of it like a spiritual boot camp for a lifelong journey. It’s like getting a solid GPS before you hit the road in your marriage. Proverbs 15:22 reminds us, "Plans fail for lack of counsel, but with many advisers, they succeed." It's like how you shouldn’t build a house on shaky ground.

Honestly, when you dive into pre-marital counseling, it’s like taking an awesome love workshop where you can explore not just communication skills but also those deep, foundational beliefs that guide a marriage. And remember, marriage is challenging but rewarding, and as Ecclesiastes 4:9-12 beautifully illustrates, two are better than one because they have a good return for their labor.

Shawn Paul is an author who lives in Kentucky. He is passionate about living for Jesus Christ and inspiring others to do the same, which is the focus of his blog, where he shares Biblical topics to help your walk with the Lord.

Shawn enjoys spending time with his wife of 38 years. Bicycling is one of their favorite pastimes. They also have two daughters and 4 grandkids.

As a writer, Shawn's unique perspective and passion for his faith shine through in his work. It is his desire to impact people for the Gospel around the world in various ways.